Wednesday, August 28, 2013

The devil and 2 brothers

I had a nightmare last weekend. Because I hardly get nightmares (unless I am specifically stressed and/or have watched a horror movie or related stuff), I pay attention when I get them.
In the dream, my 2 brothers and I were doing something together. Then they asked me to do a separate task for them while they continued on. While I was doing the separate task, a devil appeared -- telling me that I would not be able to do/finish my task. I tried calling out to my 2 brothers who were waiting for me at a short distance away -- to tell them that I cannot get back to them within their expected timeframe. But the devil smiled and laughed at my "lost voice" and unsuccessful attempts to get my brothers' attention. Finally, I choked and shouted the common "first name" of my 2 brothers.
I woke up upon hearing my own voice calling out the common "first name" of my 2 brothers. My boyfriend DD asked with concern, "Are you having a nightmare?" 

I replied, "Ya, I'm sorry to wake you up." 

He asked if I was alright. I told him yes and kissed him. He hugged me to back to sleep. 

I know what my dream was about -- its symbolism just cannot escape me. [Click here and here for hints.] For me, dreams are a communication -- to help process the past, solve current issues or to prepare for future possibilities; and/or a warning; and/or a sign/encouragement. I've had all of these before.
E.g. A PTSD dream where something that happened in my childhood was repressed and forgotten, only to burrow its way into consciousness through a re-current (over the years) nightmare. It was only decades later when chatting with my elder sister about our childhood that I found out about the event which explained the recurrent nightmare and banished it to its grave. Maybe I'll share about it someday.
[Click here for more links about dreams; and what another Singapore blogger -- a new immigrant to Australia -- has to share about how her past in Singapore re-appears in her dreams.]


  1. Maybe we are overwhelmed by the current demands of our lives that our emotions are translated into dreams. Somehow dreams can be soothing and that feeling after a weird dream after you wake up is unexplainable amazing. Dreams can be therapeutical.

    Right now, it feels so surreal to be in a foreign land that everything seems to be floating about. My dreams (if any.. Dare not dream big), my hopes, my ambition (nay) seems nothing worth chasing or even mentioning.

    Suddenly felt lost and wonder the real motive of this move. I have given up lots to gain this floating feeling and only in dreams then i could link things up. Gosh. Think I sounded v emo.

    1. Hi Space,

      Thanks for visiting and leaving a comment.

      Yes, I went through that "what was I thinking? why am I here?" feeling about migrating too. It hit me hard early (around 5 weeks after landing), especially since I could not even secure a minimum wage job at that time. At such times, one may even doubt one's sanity in making the decision to leave one's comfort zone in opting to emigrate.

      In my experience, that "panic/doubt" mood will re-surface again, especially when transiting between phases in our new homeland. E.g. Entering the professional job market.

      That said, it will also go away eventually and recur less frequently as we slowly adapt into our new country.

      Keep writing and sharing your journey!

      Cheers, WD.

    2. I am experiencing what you have gone through.
      Simply so lost and that whimpering regret kept ringing in my mind.

      Losing focus and thank you for your uplifting blog.